Raised on Love, Rooted in Faith

by Jazmin Allen-Gregory

Youth Sunday 2025

My testimony begins the moment I was born, on May 10th, 2007. However, my birth wasn’t a regular birth event. My family wasn’t standing around excited to meet me; my dad wasn’t there helping my mom through everything. Instead, the second I was born, I was quickly carried out into the other room, and I never came back into that room. Nothing was necessarily wrong with me; I might’ve been a bit shorter than the rest, but other than that, I was perfectly healthy. I was placed with my foster family for the next 9 months. February came around, and my parents were on a flight from North Carolina to Guatemala. My parents told me later that two days after my parents brought me home, adoptions from Guatemala closed. 

I would spend the rest of my life with them. I would get to experience the feeling of being loved, cared for, and supported. My parents never let a day go by without me having a sense of meaning and purpose in their lives. In fact, they always made every occasion 10x greater, and gosh, they sure did spoil me. I remember to this day my reaction on my 3rd Christmas, as I walked downstairs and looked at all the presents covering the living room: “Is all of this for me?” At this moment, nothing felt as if anything was missing. I had all I could ever ask for. I mean, right? I had my moms, my dog Oreo, a house, and not just a house but a home filled with pure love and joy. But for some reason, (as I grew older) every holiday, something was missing. I tried not to pay much attention to this feeling because I figured I was overwhelmed by all of the joy in my life. And as I continued to grow older I began to feel that emptiness throughout the whole year. 

I always grew up attending church and knowing who God was, and believing that Jesus died on the cross for our sins. But I never had a genuine connection to who Jesus was for me. Middle school arrived, and we stopped attending church because the pandemic hit. I also hit my rebellious phase of “I am going to do what I want to do,” except God had other plans. I had been 2 on medication throughout middle school for depression, anxiety, and ADHD; I decided to step away from medication because I felt like it increased my depression to an extreme near the end of 8th grade. And then, Surprise!, I returned to church before starting my first year of high school at Grimsley. 

I knew I had a community that loved and supported me, so I returned and began attending church every Sunday. I got baptized in March 2021; I decided to give my life to someone who wanted it more than I did during that period of my life. Getting baptized not only allowed me to show a commitment of faith but also an act of trusting God. 

The night before my baptism, I stayed up crying because my biological parents would not be there to experience it with me. Every significant accomplishment, whether that was a personal, athletic, or an academic accomplishment, I always felt the instinct to let my biological parents know, even if I never had a conversation with them. I always understood why my biological mom wasn’t able to take care of me. I knew that they weren’t able to feed another mouth, and I knew that God put me with my moms for a reason. I realized that the emptiness I felt that night would be something that I’d have to work through for the rest of my life. 

I found a counselor who understood me and made me feel seen; she helped me recognize that this wasn’t something I could get through alone. I would need to have a strong support system; I looked towards my parents and God. God continued to be there, regardless of whether I was angry, frustrated, or upset. Instinctively, I tried to push people away because I was always scared of being abandoned and losing people in my life. God never left my side. God never got mad at me for questioning His path for my life. Instead, God sat there and listened to my grief, my pain, and my frustration. God showed me that the fear of being abandoned wasn’t a flaw in my character. Instead, it was a way to grow and learn to be vulnerable, allowing myself to open up to people without pushing them away. 

There is a verse in Deuteronomy that says, “The Lord is the one who will go before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or abandon you. Do not be afraid or discouraged.” This verse is a reminder for me, as it was for the people of God then, that as I walk through life, the Lord will be right beside me. God will be there to celebrate my joys and accomplishments. He will also be there to catch me when I get hurt or need to cry it out. 

Instead of focusing on this feeling of emptiness or void, faith has allowed me to focus more on my relationship with God and my relationships with the people and communities surrounding me. I started praying every night that I would allow myself to open up and that I might find the friends who would teach me the meaning of friendship. A year ago, I recall someone telling me that to find safety in a friendship or relationship, I would need to allow myself to see vulnerability as a positive aspect, rather than a negative one. 

I believe that vulnerability and humility are closely intertwined. By remembering Deuteronomy 31:8, it allows me to let down my guard and open myself up without running from the fear of the unknown. 

For example – in May my plans for college completely changed. In November, I signed to play field hockey for Limestone. I was really excited – I had been training since my sophomore year with the hopes of playing field hockey in college. In May, however, Limestone announced that they would not open in the fall. This was devastating. The thought of my college plans just disappearing and the possibility of not getting to play was so hard. But I also tried to stand firm in my faith by trusting God still had a plan. As it turns out, I will still be playing field hockey in college for Newberry – and I’m really looking forward to being part of that team. 

Throughout my life, I’ve found comfort in knowing that God will never abandon me, and I trust in his word. My whole life, I felt weak, and I ran away from the fear of the unknown. Since opening myself to God in this way. I have been able to experience incredible moments and friendships by letting my guard down. By being present in the moment and trusting the people around me, God has helped me grow into the person I am today. 

As I look back over the year, I am able to reminisce on the memories I’ve created with my friends. Especially the intense uno games we play after we have stuffed ourselves with food. I also am able to reminisce on the feeling of playing the sport I love while also being able to look in the crowd full of people from my church supporting me. 

Although I will never truly get past my fear of being abandoned, my family, my church, and my faith journey have helped me develop the characteristics that I have grown into. I am patient because of the patience my family has extended towards me as I went through my emotional breakdowns. I am kind because I know that everyone has something going on behind closed doors, as I once did. I am considerate because my moms will always continue to go out of their way to make sure I know that I am loved and cared for, especially in my vulnerable moments. I have a big heart, and I love deeply those I care about because God, my moms, and my church have shown me what true, unconditional love is. Love is being with someone during their weakest moments without judgment, while also celebrating their accomplishments, big or small. 

By trusting in God, I knew that facing my fear would not only make me stronger but also help me to become a better person than I once was. When you hand something to God, it isn’t a sign of weakness; instead, it’s a sign of strength. Being able to accept that you aren’t perfect and being okay with that allows you to grow into someone who understands themselves.

I think of it like a puzzle. Each of us is a puzzle in progress. We start with the border—those rigid edges we build to protect ourselves, to define what we let in and what we keep out. But the puzzle isn’t complete with just the edges. The real picture takes shape when we allow other pieces—experiences, people, challenges, even pain—to fill in the empty spaces. Some pieces might be temporary, others lasting. But each one, in its own way, helps shape who we are. And sometimes, when we let God in, we discover that even the missing pieces can still teach us something about the process of becoming whole. However, the only way for any of this to happen is by being vulnerable and opening yourself up to others, allowing you to experience both the good and the bad. 

Isaiah 40:31 says, “but those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not become weary, they will walk and not faint.” This verse reminds me of who I once was without the Lord’s help and who I am with the Lord’s help. By trusting in God, I have become a better person who can help others on their life’s journey. Instead of being scared of meeting new people in college, I am now excited to open up and meet new people. By trusting in God, I have created a strong and grounded foundation for when I experience hardships, knowing that when I fall, I can get back up again. 

I challenge everyone to be honest with yourself and to consider what keeps you from opening yourself up to God or to others. Is it fear of failure, impatience, emotional dependence, the need for approval? Whatever it may be, the invitation to all of us is to give it to God – and to allow God to work in our lives knowing that God promises to always be with us and to give us strength for the journey. One thing I have learned from everything is to allow yourself to grieve and be upset when something goes wrong, but also look for the good in every situation. Opening yourself up in this way is not easy, but it is a more fulfilling way to live in this life. 

Thinking back over my life, I know that God has always gone before me, walked alongside me, and has never abandoned me. God has transformed what I thought was a weakness into a strength of character that I will always have. And by embracing the discomfort, I have learned that challenges can be opportunities to grow into a stronger, wiser version of myself. 

As I look ahead, I carry with me all the moments—joyful and painful—that have shaped me into who I am. I still wrestle with questions, and I still feel the ache of what’s been lost or left unknown. But I no longer carry that ache alone. The God who formed me, who called me by name, who goes before me, is the same God who will walk with me into all that is still to come. I trust that the story God is writing in my life is not finished yet—and it is good. My prayer is that you, too, will find the courage to be vulnerable, to trust God with your fears, and to allow grace to fill the empty spaces in your own puzzle. And that you might know that you are never alone.